Marriage Bible Study

Last week for homework in our Bible Study on marriage we had to search our hearts and ask the Lord to reveal to us what our underlying emotion or feeling were that caused us to react in a negative way to our spouse. We had discussed that often it really isn't the fact that he is late or that she is nagging him about it, but there is some deep hurt, wound, or fear. As I thought about it over the last week, I found several things. What it really came down to was really similar to what others shared.We feel inadequate in what we do or who we are. When someone points out a short coming we "blow up" or "go inside ourselves" because they are only illuminating what we all ready know ,"We suck". Although that is not the truth and not at all what they are saying, we internalize and assume so much. An example of this is when Lenny looks in his dresser and sees that he doesn't have any clean jeans. He sighs, knowing that he now has to walk to the dryer to get some. His sigh is simply that, a sigh. What I hear is sometimes, "What do you do all day, why can't you even get the laundry done, you are a horrible homemaker and need to get it together." So often what we really have to do is ask God to help us, reveal how He sees us and change those things that we can...but what we do is fight with the one we love most and retaliate and tell them what they are doing wrong. Without God nothing is possible, but with God all things are possible!
Its amazing how what we see on the outside doesn't always give atrue idea of what is going on inside. Like in Autumn the leaves are beautiful, but on the inside, the leaves are actually dying. But what is awesome is the tree is preparing for the new growth that will come the following spring. "To everything there is a season"